Shameful, dirty, humiliating, disgusting - ☺BURP☺ - but someone has to talk about it

OK, I'll admit it, my dogs have been known to nibble on one of these delightful, crunchy, delicious winter treats. The colder the weather the better to freeze up just the right amount of pop and crackle when the jaws of dog-srtuction chomp down into the rich flavor of their homemade aromatic goodness. Better than a dozen cat turds, most dogs can't pass up a delicious, wintertime snack when it's right there in front of their snooters. Over the years I have tried everything to get mine to stop their winter snacking competitions short of holding a plastic bag right under their soft-serve machine before the nummy tootsie poops hit the snow.

I've been on dog lists long enough (15 years) to know that mankind has tried a variety of remedies to discourage canine outdoor snacking. What has worked best for me to keep Scout and Freyja on a diet of dog food BEFORE it is recycled is a meticulously clean yard plus Fig Newtons cookies. Yes, you heard me, FIG NEWTONS! I had no idea why they work or how they work but they do, and have cut down the in-between-meal-snacking by about 85%.

It was clear to me that something in the Fig Newton treats makes the poop less appetizing. I looked into this a bit and it turns out that fig plants produce ficin, a protease enzyme that aids digestion by breaking down amino acids and works similarly to the enzymes in papayas (papain) and pineapple (bromelin). And yes, all three enzymes can be used as meat tenderizers. As it turns out, the item in the Fig Newtons that is at work is the figs themselves. Interestingly, there are urban legends out there about feeding dogs pineapple to resolve this problem as well.

For the most part, if I keep my pantry loaded with what the dogs think is the most delightful snack, imagining that mommy has lost her mind to give them people food, I can keep their Dairy Queen excursions down to an acceptable minimum. Why am I blogging about this horrible topic, you might ask? Well, my son's dogs have now picked up (in more ways than one) a love of this wintry doggy  buffet. I suggested the Newtons, which they have purchased and are feeding, but I am asking all of you for your tried-and-true remedy to keep a dog's mouth sparkling clean with the gas coming out of both their ends from smelling less like a community septic tank just in case Cody and Suzie are hard-core Poopsicle eaters!

So, if your dog eats poopie (if you want to say it's your neighbor's dog for identity privacy issues, that's OK) and you have found a great remedy that curbs their obsession/addiction, please comment. I'm sure my son and his wife and their kids and all of the collective noses in their house, both resident and guest, will thank you - and honor your name -  whenever one of their dogs comes inside with sweet-smelling breath and a grin that doesn't look like they have just consumed a Hershey Bar☺